MAKE MY NATION WELL-DONE AND HOLD THE FREEDOM FRIES

What, exactly is this "freedom" thing?

Freedom. Now there’s a word that used have some sort of meaning. It was a word that shimmered like a breeze, making one’s hair flutter gently about like an American flag on a fine breezy day. Then at some point it turned into a right wing fart balloon that puffed out a breeze that made a bald guy feel pouty for not having the kind of hair that flutters gently about like an American flag on a fine breezy day.

We have freedom fries: a nutrition-free artery clogger renamed as a weapon to torment the French (apparently by laughing themselves into exhaustion) because they weren’t down with our cataclysmic invasion of Iraq – our mission to provide the Iraqi people – yea, all the people of the Muslim Middle East – with freedom. And freedom fries doused in ketchup and lotsa salt. And throw in freedom toast with Aunt Jamima corn… uh… maple syrup.

Freedom Tower: the monument to our departed 9/11 heroes murdered by aliens from two non-free nations that we’d amply provided with weapons and dollars; and still do. Every aspect of the Freedom Tower was freely determined by one man with the goal of enriching that one man – Larry Silverstein, the owner.

The Freedom Caucus… why bother. I made my point.

The Bible does not claim any God-given freedom to do whatever. In fact it’s jammed full of every which thing that we’re not supposed to do that’s none of it’s god damn beezwax. The American Constitution never defined liberty as freedom to every single thing we want to do because we want to do it. In fact the Constitution as written denys liberty to more than half the population of the Land of the Free. It embraces the concept of freedom and liberty, as do I. Particularly the “all folks are created equal” part. But that’s my bias filter.

The 2016 election of a mentally unstable autocrat as our president saw his most ardent support coming from the Freedom Caucus and white supremacists of all stripes. It was helped along by some hard line Bernie supporters voting for Libertarians because Hillary Clinton was y’know like too establishment.

The biggest frauds in American politics are:

• the myth of our free market system which is actually a crony monopolistic system that spends many millions annually lobbying against open competition

• religious freedom which only becomes an issue when the law of the land imposes restrictions on discrimination against certain identity groups. The Constitution declares freedom from the imposition of any religion upon non-followers; and it outlaws any form of government-sanctioned religion. No suggestion that religious belief has precedence over established law.

• the freedom and liberty gassers who are the most rigidly fundamentalist and exclusionary political sector, slightly to the pinkish side of the Aryan Master Race sector; and

• libertarianism.

Libertarianism crosses party lines for the same reason a broken clock tells the correct time twice a day. People of every ideological persuasion have their pet issues that God and George Washington deemed protected from government interference. Whether on the Right or Left, libertarians fervently believe that my favorite vices and pastimes should be off the books. On the other hand, it’s government’s job to step in and stop you from doing the things I don’t like for the sake of national security and staying true to the Judeo/Christian ethic that forms our nation’s DNA despite that ethic being articulated nowhere in the founding paperwork.

Unregulated gun ownership, recreational drugs, forcibly renovating foreign governments, gay marriage, abortion, public homages to slavery, prostitution, prayer in public schools. transgender peeing in the toilet of its choice, polluting public waterways for profit. So the guy’s against outlawing drugs. He was also against civil rights legislation.

I believe government should keep its commie nose out of half those things. And put a humane and just fence around the other half. But I’m not so selfie-assed as to claim libertarianism as a front for my biasphere.

— Polar Levine, News Goo Dissection, October 20, 2017

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